letoldthingsdie | IC Inbox faderift

It's okay. But I've never... It was just distracting.

[ She liked how it felt, she can admit to herself, but rather than soothing it made her skin tingle and the last thing she wanted was him to stop. But she's also never shared a bed with another person. She's gotten used to Padawan and the way the dog shifted around in bed, but another human is entirely different.

Still, she doesn't want to let him go, doesn't want to go back to her room where the nightmares happened. At least tonight.

She exhales again, letting her eyes slide closed again. Her hands stay on his as she relaxes, trying to let herself float, rather than getting caught up in her own mind. Easier said than done. ]

Edited 2018-04-02 03:56 (UTC)

[He doesn't answer her, accepting her words instead. She wasn't angry and he wasn't going to distract her. Of course, now that she's here he is having trouble concentrating on sleeping. For now it was probably better he just wait and hope she fell asleep first. Clearly he needed to get used to this given he was the one to make the last second decision to bring her in here. He generally didn't make a habit of bringing anyone into his room but he hasn't been here even a month so was it really his room? This place was far from home to him.

All of that aside: he could tell she felt better being away from her room, for the moment. Even if having someone holding his hand was distracting, he would put up with it if it meant she wasn't thrashing about alone and unable to escape the nightmares.

The less effort he put into trying to relax, the better he seemed to be able to after a time. Her presence was like that of their connection that could be felt across a greater distance. The only difference between the two was proximity. Maybe he might actually get a good nights sleep for a change?]

Edited (accidentally posted too soon whoops) 2018-04-02 04:09 (UTC)

[ Without the distraction of him rubbing circles and their awkward conversation Rey is finally able to relax, the fact that she really was tired closing in around her.

A few minutes after silence fell between them her breathing evened out, and she drifted back into sleep, much less fitful this time. Her hold on his hand didn't loosen, almost like he's a life-line to keeping her grounded in reality. ]

[He thought it would be possible to sleep and yet he lays there, his hand in hers, and waits for the silence to lull him into his subconscious. He finds hearing her breathing to be calming enough but his mind keeps turning over thoughts that they had shared and he finds he can't turn his mind off and will himself to sleep.

Sighing, he forces himself to get comfortable again, his hand staying in hers as he does. Luckily this wouldn't be something he would have to get used to. He was doing her a favor - both of them, really. If he had left her alone she would have kept on filling his head with her screaming thoughts. Now she was blissfully devoid of them.

Looking down at her, he wonders - not for the first time - how this damned girl could get under his skin so easily. Carefully, he tucks her blanket comfortably against her curled up form while he watches her sleep. Seeing her at ease was slowly starting to put him at ease and he felt his eyes drift shut again.]

[ Several hours later when morning comes Rey stirs from a peacefully dreamless sleep feeling warm and like she'd had the best night of sleep in a long time. At first she thinks she's curled up against Padawan and smiles a little, stretching her arm out to stroke her hand over the mabari's fur, but her hand isn't met with the somewhat rough texture of mabari fur, but rather smooth skin.

That's when her mind catches up to her body, and she remembers she's in Kylo's bed. With Kylo. Somehow in their sleep they'd migrated closer together, close enough that her head was tucked up under his chin, her arm was draped around his waist and his was wrapped around her, and her leg, (bare leg, she realized in horror that she hadn't been wearing sleeping trousers) was sticking out of her blanket, hooked around one of his.

Trying not to panic or to let the fact that she was suddenly very awake and freaking out a little seep through their connection she starts trying to disentangle herself from him, starting with her leg. She tries to scoot away from him, as gently as possible. ]

[Like the snapping of a twig, even the smallest movement from her wakes him. His mind not catching up with the situation, Kylo's instincts kick in and he grabs the culprit's shoulders to pin them to the bed. His gaze is stern and menacing for a moment before he realizes who it is. His face lifts into one of surprise.]

Rey?

[Their legs are still very much tangled together, made worse by his attempt to pin her in his half awake state. He lets her go almost immediately as if he's been burned, one hand raking through his hair as he stumbles from the bed to his feet.]

Sorry, you- I guess I forgot about last night.

[ Rey lets out a little sound of alarm as he pins her, Padawan next to them in the bed's head shoots up, alert in a second as to if her partner is injured, but she's not, mostly surprised.

If she hadn't woken up so comfortable, curled up against him, she might have done the same thing. Hurrying to pull her blankets around her waist to conceal her bare legs she sits up, shaking her head. ]

It's fine. I would have done the same thing.

[ She looks embarrassed, trying to sort out her blankets on the bed from his, it's all sort of become a mess in sleep, and she doesn't want to leave the room exposed in any way. ]

[He doesn't want to look at her, feeling embarrassment - such a foreign feeling when he never let himself get close enough to anyone to ever feel it - creep up on him. When he does dare to look, having thrown a shirt over his torso, its to see that she has her blanket wrapped around her waist.

He doesn't know what to say so instead he just watches her, his eyes moving from her face down to her legs curled up beneath her blanket. His gaze travels back upwards in the same fashion, curiosity lingering in his thoughts. Had they really moved close to one another in their sleep? He definitely can't say it was just her doing. He remembers waking up to his arm wrapped around her before it sunk in that she was moving away and his instincts kicked in.]

How did you sleep?

[For lack of anything better to say, he wants to at least find out that much.]

Edited 2018-04-03 01:03 (UTC)

[ She's also pointedly not looking at him. It still flusters her to see him without a shirt, as used to shirtless men wandering around the training grounds as she's become. He's so entirely different, someone that she's seen in darkness, and in brief moments of light. She can feel his eyes on her, though, and eventually looks back at him, relieved to see he's found a shirt.

At his question she frowns, thinking for a moment, before her expression smooths out and she tilts her head. She realizes she feels like she got a better night of sleep than she's had in a long while, not that she's going to say as much aloud. She doesn't know why, but that feels like an admission of some kind, to something she isn't ready to admit. ]

I slept well. How about you?

[He runs a hand through his hair, shrugging his shoulders at her question. He hadn't ever slept beside someone before her. It left him open to vulnerabilities he didn't want to explore. She could have killed him in his sleep if she wanted to, for example. She could have snored - he could have snored - and he wouldn't have been the wiser until now.]

I slept. This place still takes getting used to. It's different, not having droids waiting for commands when you wake.

[She hadn't experienced this at home or here. He realizes he's lived quite a privileged life by comparison. He remembers as a boy that there had been a droid serving as a nanny - Elsie, his parents had called it. The thing had been so over zealous in it's duties that it often got under foot.
The First Order was no different, with it's droids that went swept about the halls of the Supremacy.]

I had to get used to the beds.

[ She offers, a corner of her mouth lifting. She'd never had droids in her face, aside from when BB-8 had come to her. The beds, though. She'd slept in a makeshift hammock most of her life, and on Ahch-To she'd slept on a stone slab. though the beds here were likely not as fine as some of the ones found in Hightown houses or Orlesian palaces, they were softer than anything she'd ever slept in.

Shifting herself she slides off the bed, careful to keep her blankets gathered around her waist as she does, straightening on the side opposite from him. ]

I'm sorry for this. It won't happen again.

[He takes her in, now standing on the other side of the bed. He could say he was inconvenienced by her presence but that would be wrong. He was the one who had brought her here.]

I didn't think you wanted to be alone, or I wouldn't have done it.

[Why that should matter, why he didn't just put her out of his mind, was beyond his control or understanding. He knew she felt it too, the pull they had on one another.]

I'm not used to having other people in my room.

[He'd never had real friends as he got older - his thoughts had always been too guarded for him to ever want to be closer to people. Having Snoke lurking like a dark shadow inside his mind had made it difficult for him, more so as the darkness in his heart grew.]

I'm not used to sharing a bed with someone, either.

[ But all the same she's very appreciative of him bringing her into his room, even if the wake up was embarrassing. Still, she'd gotten more sleep than she would have if she'd remained in her own room. She shifts a little, kind of wanting to run out the door, but also wanting to stay. It's a strange feeling. ]

[He stands for a moment, still watching her, and waits to see whether she might try to leave or if he should tell her to. He didn't know what to do, even if his instincts tell him to shut her out, along with the weakness lingering in his heart that she had put there.

He moves towards the door leading to the hall, her room just beyond it, and waits for her to follow him.]

I imagine you'll be wanting to go back to your room to get dressed.

Yes. Yes I do.

[ She seizes on that, because of course he wants her out of his hair. She also would rather not be standing here wrapped in a blanket, so why she's not fleeing she doesn't know. Now she moves though, heading towards the door with Padawan in her wake. She does pause to turn back to look at him as she reaches for the latch, reminded of her own door. ]

You'll come fix my door later?

Yes, I'll fix it later.

[He levels her with a look.]

If this place wasn't so kriffing backwards it wouldn't have been a problem.

[Says the literal prince who has lived with sliding automatic doors his whole life.]

I'll be around for a while, but I have repairs I need to do in the other tower. If I'm not there, use the crystals to call me. Or come find me. Just don't break in.

[ She raises her eyebrows at him. ]

Again.

Right.

[A beat.]

How did you come by your work?

[Out of curiosity, really. It's not as if he wants to entrench himself more with these people but he never did well sitting still. Like father like son, his mother might say if she were here.]

[ She turns back towards him, her hands holding her blankets tightly at her waist. ]

I'm decent at fixing things, and they needed people doing maintenance. There are only a few of us. You can always speak to the division leaders, they'll find you work, if you want it.

I'll do that. Thank you.

[He clears his throat, not sure what else he should do or say after last night. Nothing had changed, of course. Helping her didn't change his ideas of what the future should look like. It didn't change that she'd said no to him either.]

I'll... come by your room later to fix your door.

[He twists the knob, opening the door for her to leave and return to her room.]

I'll see you later, then.

[ Bobbing her head awkwardly she steps past him, looking carefully out into the hallway to make sure that no one is happening by just as she makes her dash of shame. Once she's sure the coast is clear she clicks her tongue at Padawan and heads off briskly in the direction of her own room. She'd been annoyed when he'd chosen a room so close to hers, but now she's honestly grateful for the proximity. ]

[He watches her go, Padawan at her side, and doesn't look away until she's disappeared into her room, her broken door the only thing shutting her out from him physically. When he found himself going back to bed to lay down, he could still smell her and feel the warmth she'd left behind on the sheets and pillow.]

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